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How to Help

  • Be gentle, supportive, and understanding as you talk about this delicate and unsettling topic. Discussing the possibility that they are a victim of abuse can be difficult for the young person you’re trying to help. 

  • Be approachable. Don't come across as wiser. Avoid statements that could convey that you believe this would never have happened to you.

  • Share a handout that lists the warning signs of abuse. Reading over the warning signs may help the person.

  • Ensure the resource includes a phone number, other resources for help, and safety information, such as how to call the resource from someone else’s phone.

  • Listen. Once you’ve broached the topic, if the victim or survivor starts acknowledging the existence of abuse, listen more than talk. 

  • Believe the victim and show that you take whatever they share with you seriously. Validate their feelings and show your support. 

  • Don't underestimate the intensity of their situation due to age, dating inexperience, or the length of the relationship.

  • Be patient. It may take them some time to be ready to leave the relationship. 

  • When they're receptive, help them develop a safety plan, such as avoiding the kitchen (which has knives), avoiding being alone with the abusive person, and knowing how to reach for help if needed.

  • School Resources. After checking whether the victim is comfortable with your doing so, consider contacting their school and asking about its policy regarding dating violence.

For additional information, please visit the Resources page. 

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

1 Thessalonians 5:11

Let's connect.


Dee Dee and licensed counselors are available to speak at schools, churches, businesses, and other organizations or groups to help raise awareness and protect our youth. 


Send us a message and we’ll get back to you soon.

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